Jenn's Reverie
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Let the Demons Have Their Place, If So It's Angels You Will Create
So, here's the thing right, your "individuality" is just like someone else's individuality. So that kinda makes you not so individual, no? Like, your studded belt, it's just like all the other studded belts. Oh, and your Chucks, they're just like all the Chucks everyone else buys. Well, I think mine are better than yours, but that's irrelevant.
Here's the thing, I'm not pointing fingers at anyone specifically, I'm just pointing. I'm sick of all this "I'm different" "I'm better" "I'm smarter" bullshit. Fuck you. You're no different than all of the other shitbags (thanks, Katie) trying to be different. I don't care if you're smarter, I don't care if you dress "different" or "vintage" and I certainly don't give a fuck if you're a label whore. Do what you gotta do, just quit trying to prove your uniqueness. Quit trying to prove how you're so different and it makes you the all high and mighty. No one gives a fuck. And sorry, but nothing about you is high and mighty, maybe you're just high.
Let's take punk for example. "Punk" kids think they're different. Okay, maybe back in the day they were different, but, be not fooled, they were still like all the other punk kids. Which kinda defeats the whole purpose, wouldn't you say? Back in the good ol' days it was an attitude, not an appearance. . . so they say. Bullshit. It WAS an attitude, but, appearance obviously had something to do with it, too. They had their own style. From clothes to hair. Just like every group does. Which, brings me to my point.
I have not one gahdamn issue with any "group" or "clique." Everyone fits in somewhere. Why the fuck do some groups feel the fucking need to crack on others? Whether it's music, clothes, hang-outs, etc. What makes your fucking "clique" better than the next? NOTHING. You are comfortable where you are, just like they are comfortable where THEY are. So what if someone wears Abercrombie & Fitch? What's it to you? And mostly, why the fuck is it so upsetting it gets under your skin and you feel the need to talk shit about it? Who cares if they listen to main stream hip-hop or main stream anything. They like it because THEY like it. Yeah, I make fun of my Abercrombie wearing friends, just like I make fun of my punk friends. In the end, I really don't give a fuck what you like. If anything, I can learn new things or maybe find some new music and vise versa. Why do people feel the need to judge so damn quickly? All that's really happening is they're missing out on some potential friendships. Hell, you see me with an Abercrombie wearing friend one day and the next with a thrift store shopping friend. What, the thrift store one is better because she is "vintage?" Or the Abercrombie one is more "high-class?" Fuck all that noise. Can people be any more lame? Oh yes, yes they can.
Be who the you want to be because YOU like it. Fuck what everyone else thinks and don't be so quick to fucking judge. I shock the hell outta of most people. If you were basing me off appearance. I'd say most of the time I fit into the "hi-hop," "normal-esq," or "career girl" categories, but inside I'm all up in the rock scenes. Be it punk, hardcore, metal, Indie, etc. Oh and how I hear the metal people say I can't me metal AND punk or vise versa and so on and so forth. You know what? I CAN BE both. And you know why? Because I just fucking can. Sorry to burst any bubbles. And after I look "hip hop" today, tomorrow I'll look gahdamn rock and roll. Because I can!
I'd be lying if I said I didn't care what people thought about me. I'm working really hard on that. REALLY hard. And it's not easy. I think sometimes I worry to a point where people misconcieve my care of what others think to being an attention whore. Understandable. Wrong, but understandable. Like I said, working on it, and I shall prevail! Anyhow, I don't exclude potential friends because they aren't what I am or aren't into what I'm into. And for the most part, the company I keep is the same. I'm not too busy trying to prove how I'm "different" from them and it means I'm better. I'm not too busy trying to prove that the music I like is better than theirs. I'm not trying to say my ways of life are right and theirs are wrong. "To each their own." I always hear that being quoted, but it's rare that I see it being applied. There is nothing so unique about a person that someone out there doesn't share. So quit trying to be so fucking different. YOU ARE JUST LIKE ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE TRYING TO BE DIFFERENT.
I know this post was all over the place and maybe it doesn't even have a point or make sense at all but, ask me if I care? Oh yeah, one more thing, it IS all about me. Thought you knew, bitches!
posted by Jenn Doll at 1:42 AM
18 Comments:
I agree. Totally. And I also feel you on caring what people think about me -- I do, more so than I should, but it's there.
And one more thing -- this is YOUR blog.It SHOULD be all about you.
fear.
fear is a Major Motivator when it comes to our desire to fit in/not fit in.
what will (the right) people think?
The sentiment behind the post is admirable, but perhaps just as remarkable is your admission that you are working on the same issue.
This is something we all face. Can I be lovable if people knew the real me?
I stood in the crowded warmth of the crowd.
When they said sit down, I stood up.
Oh, oh, growing up
Jenn letting it fly! Excellent. Do the things you've been talking about and don't worry about the rest.
"Well said! That's a hard concept to get one's mind around completely and you've done well. It is always about me, about you, about them...the key is what the it is. Like Miyagi says,
"Daniel-San, karate here(Head).Karate here(Heart).Karate never here(Belt)."
How we show people what we are(and how they show us) is not as important as what we know and feel that we are.
I don't do the group identity thing. I don't have peers, only accomplices.
I gotta a friend who spends $800 on clothes every few months.
$200 on a Boss thermal top, $300 jeans, $250 big collared, big cuffed, shiny shirt. $50 worth of wife-beaters and socks.
HE still hasn't gotten laid in the ten years I've known him.
And he gives ME shit about my duds.
HAH!
I've always lived by the credo, "If you can't accept me for who I am, I don't need you in my life". Of course, that probably explains why I can count my true friends on one hand...
Jenn, as much as I enjoy old school punk music, 98% of all punk was about being a poser and style back in the day. Sid Vicious couldn't even play his bass barely and the SP's manager only put him in the band because he had the "punk look". I mean the only true punk artist that comes to mind is GG Allin who literally took shits on stage and threw it at people and jerked off on stage and broke bottles and stabbed himself. That's pretty punk, wearing torn jeans and a leather jacket with buttons on it and having a mohawk is nothing but being a poser. Rancid, Sex Pistols (Vicious era), and yes even the Misfits (who were gimmick punk) were all style whores.
As far as style goes though, if people want to rock the suave look fuck it, I do it sometimes because dressing nice really has an effect on people. I was thinking of doing a study back when I was in school about the social stigma of clothing. Maybe when I go back I can finish that, sometime we have some time I'll tell you some of my research I did and you'll be like WHOA no way. PS I love you you sexy beyotch.
You are such a goofball! I love it when you rant.
Jenn, you should see what I have to put up with every day at school.
I'm going to memorize your post, and recite it to each group who thinks it's cool to knock the other.
Better yet, I'll just copy it and hand it out. K?
AMEN!
NICE RANT!!!!
Regarding "being all over the place" ...CONGRATULATIONS! ...Your human.
In my very unprofessional, totally biased, extemely personal opinion ... individuality (uniqueness) only resides in our brains (the thing that keeps our ears separated for all of us college educated types)
Love that post Jenn. Isn't it funny how all the non-conformists look alike?
Now I admit, I'm a metalhead. Love the music, still to this day. Wife likes R&B. She's also on the opposite end of the political spectrum, but who cares? We get along great, never argue, never discuss politics.
I really like Joe's comment. If the guy can't get tail, who cares how much he spends on clothes.
Jenn, if you want everyone to like you, quit trying to be a goddamn individual. I thought I told you that already. And if you don't want everyone to like you..well I don't know what to tell you then. You're going against nature or something. So stop before you fuck all the evolution up. And you're welcome, apetitty.
Your start made me think you were going on a full-out Tyler Durden-inspired tirade from Fight Club: "You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else, and we are all part of the same compost pile."
Good rant--that's the Jenn I've been missing. Welcome back, biatch!!
-- david
But what if being an individual means that they have choosen something diametrically opposed to your own views? Just a thought. B)
Don't hold back, Jen! Let it all hang out!
This was cool.
you're special, and I don't mean in the "special" way this time.
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