Monday, August 30, 2004
Where am I
I don't want to be here. Where? Here! Anywhere. I just want to be laying next to my son. When I am over-whelmed with this thing called life I just want to be with him. I am his protector, but he is my angel. . .
Angel's come in all shapes and sizes. You don't know who it may be. But if you look deep into the souls of those around you, you will find within YOUR soul why they are in your life and you their's at that given moment. Maybe they aren't supposed to be in your life forever or you their's. But when the time comes that they or you have to go, you will be content with knowing that you have completed your life's journey with that person. Whether it be for a day or a lifetime. The one's y0u hold dear are somehow your angel. They may not know how dear it is you hold them, but you know. It's over-whelming when you feel you are the angel that many need. Though it's a blessing. Why was I given such a gift? I will never have the answer, but I know that it is my life's journey and I will continue that path. Each time I hear how I've influenced someone in life, I will feel my soul only grow. Some say I'm a martyr. I've dug deep and have found that it's true. So I am reminded that when life is over-whelming, that tomorrow is another day in this journey of life. And I shall continue to walk it, alone if I must, but the path will be walked. When I get to those unexpected y's in the road I know that I have to choose in which way to walk, when that decision is made, I can't look back. I have to continue on my way and remember that the path I chose is for a reason. I can only have faith that I am walking in the right direction. . .
(Maybe I just over-slept?)
posted by Jenn Doll at 11:30 PM
So yeah, my last blogs have been rather asinine. This I know. It's great to get people's reactions when you come out of your box. So today I get, "you're coming to the darkside, Jenn" twice. I am the darkside, slackers! Really, I don't know what you mean by the darkside. Quite frankly, I am who I am. And I could say something like "like it or fuck you." But the truth of it is, I want to be loved. So I aim to please. Sometimes I please too much and then they don't go away. Fly Pelican, fly! (compliments of Scarface). Anyhow, the reason for the asinine blogging is because I'm just having too much fun with it right now. With Gabe, Eric, Katie and Bill. It has become to me an absolute enjoyment. Especially when they comment or talk about me, because I'm an attention whore. Who isn't?! Don't lie either! So thank you four for luffing me! You can all admit it now. For real, it's okay. I luff you too, so you can breath now! As for the poopie blog, don't say you didn't laugh at least once. If you didn't you're lame and I'm not afraid to hit a bitch. Until next time. . .
Let me outta my box, you'll like it!
posted by Jenn Doll at 7:30 PM
The Poopie List
GHOST POOPIE: The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.
CLEAN POOPIE: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
WET POOPIE: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.
SECOND WAVE POOPIE: This happens when you're done poopie-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to poopie some more.
POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD POOPIE: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
LINCOLN LOG POOPIE: The kind of poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
GASSY POOPIE: It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.
DRINKER'S POOPIE: The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
CORN POOPIE: Self explanatory.
I-WISH-I-COULD-POOPIE POOPIE: The kind where you want to poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
SPINAL TAP POOPIE: That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.
WET CHEEKS POOPIE (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.
THE DANGLING POOPIE: This poopie refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done poopie-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.
THE SURPRISE POOPIE: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a poopie!
posted by Jenn Doll at 2:23 AM
Saturday, August 28, 2004
Bill & Katie
This here post is dedicated to my best ho's eva! U r bof stewpid! But I love you guys. I know that recently the two of you have started your very own blogs, because naturally you want to be like me. I'm excited that you have done this, but I am also very afraid, because you're both crazy bastards! And no matter if I'm here or not, I somehow manage to get thrown in to the fire. Thank you both! Well I'll take un momento to tell about them (you 'cause you're reading). First there's the crazy white girl who is from a gang, who loves old guys named Bob Dylan she is KatieHo aka KatieSlut aka Biootch or sometimes just plain Katie. She's a beautiful young lady who has a life sometimes and goes to college. She and I are always accused of being lesbian's, so recently I purposed to her and she accepted. But then she went and fucked it up like she knows how, so I had to slap a bitch and call it all off. We still love each other, but no more wedding. She will remain only a bootie call. She never calls me Jenn, it's always followed by an obscene comment or name. Like, JennHo, JennSlut, Crazy Hispanic and so forth. She likes to see me cry. But the loving person that I am let's me forgiver her each and every time. We text message each other, but I get easily frustrated because she is Caveman Katie and knows nothing about technology. That's why she even started a blog in the first place. Her blog address has my name in it, and I am very flattered for it. She wanted to change it but I told her she couldn't because this is how it all started and a memory! But she will someday, because she's gangster like that. If you want to see what Katie thinks, you can find her at www.goddamyoujenn.blogspot.com
. That's right goddamn you jenn. Isn't she sweet?!
Okay, then there's Bill aka the Billdo aka Spanky aka Turd. He's the biggest instigator in the whole wide world! Also the most manipulative little bastard I've met. Bill loves Katie and I and wishes more then anything in this world that he could have us both. When I am gone he loves Katie, when she is gone he loves me. When we are both here, he tries to make us fight or loves us both. He likes to chase chat-tards away and he is the bestest at what he does. He wants to sleep with SnuggleSnatch, but I've sent her to bunnieboiler. I think he's still mad about this. He calls me names and tries to relate me to her because he's still hurt that he didn't get his nudies. Jenn ruined it! Sorry Bill, but she's a rat and you're a jackass for paying it attention! I'm still mad too, so there! You owe me apologies. If you want to see what goes on in Spanky's mind he can be found at www.teambildo.blogspot.com
Together, Bill and Katie are infamous for being retards. They listen to weird songs and watch weird shows/movies on tv. People make fun of them and they just say "you wouldn't understand." I think we all understand that they relate so well because they are both very "special." They play big people games like Go Fish and sing big people songs from Popeye. They call each other names all the time, but for them it means something "special."
I need to thank both you sluts for mentioning moi in your blogs, yeah even you Bill. Though I was wish to be flushed. Damn Katie! She's the one that called your guy in your blog a douchebag. Flush her! I love you Katie! I will be here to assist both you jackasses when you know not what's going on. I don't have a problem with it. Yes, I will make fun of you each time, but I will help. We can't all be like the Jenius! Hahah! And if you EVER call me the name I hate again, you will be straight be dissed, deleted, cancelled, and dismissed, buh-bye! That is thee only thing I ask of you two. Then together we can all just get along and be friends.
Much love to you both you bitches!
posted by Jenn Doll at 5:15 PM
Friday, August 27, 2004
Well, first I must say that I've been blog crazy these past few day's. I probably won't be back 'til after the weekend and I'll have stories to tell then. Three day weekend and it's the annual Fall Crawl! Yeah baby! Anyhow, I jacked this 411 from M. It's great. Personally, I have fear of roaches! Eww, I shudder at the thought. Here are some other fears. . .
- The fear of bald people- Peladophobia.
- The fear of Beautiful women- Caligynephobia. *Does this apply to all the jealous girls?
- The fear of Clothing- Vestiphobia. *So would you be a nudist?
- The fear of Friday the 13th- Paraskavedekatriaphobia. *I got in a fight this last one. What's that about?! And FYI, she started it!
- The fear of Laughter- Geliophobia. *I fear that the other day, I laughed too hard and too long at nothing on this damn computer! Does that count? b-(
- The fear of Parents-in-law- Soceraphobia. *I need a husband first, before I can be diagnosed with this. Any volunteers?
- The fear of Peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth- Arachibutyrophobia.
- The fear of Thinking- Phronemophobia. *I fear many have this and so they don't.
- The fear of Words, long- Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia. *That word is fearful.
- The fear of Hair- Chaetophobia, Trichopathophobia, Trichophobia, or Hypertrichophobia
- The fear of Body, things to the left side of the body- Levophobia.
- The fear of Body, things to the right side of the body- Dextrophobia.
- The fear of Chins- Geniophobia. *If someone has this fear, that just scares me.
- The fear of Good news, hearing good news- Euphobia *If you have this, shoot yourself. Don't get all emmotional! Someone telling you to shoot yourself is not good news.
- The fear Kissing- Philemaphobia or Philematophobia. *Is there a word for the opposite? Fear of NOT kissing? As in addicted to kissing?
- The fear of Work- Ergophobia or Ponophobia *Umm, I have the fear of knowing I'll be working for 25 years 'til retirement. That counts, or no?
So anyhow, I thought those were pretty interesting. If you have fears like this, I am sorry. I hope that you will seek therapy. Until next time. . .
Fear not the Jenn!
posted by Jenn Doll at 1:24 AM
Thursday, August 26, 2004
My Sweet Knight
For I wish to lay my head upon the chest of a Prince,
But the Knight has come and rescued
me from this castle of distress.
Oh sweet Knight,what have you done?
In your sweet attempt to save me,
you have removed me from my dream.
My sweet Knight, you wish me to lay my
head upon YOUR chest, but your armour
is not that of the chest of a Prince,
in which my head is made to fit.
Oh sweet Knight, what have you done?
In your sweet attempt to save me,
you have removed me from my dream.
posted by Jenn Doll at 7:39 PM
Missing Ruby Slippers
I stood in the middle of the room
I clicked my heals together
And as I closed my eyes I wished. . .
When I opened them, to my surprise
I was still standing in the same room
Hopelessly, I put my head down, only to
see that I was not wearing ruby slippers
Thereupon I realized, that I simply need to wake
from this dream. . .
From a distance the world looks blue and green. . .
posted by Jenn Doll at 4:35 AM
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
I just thought I'd take time to pimp a few blog's here on mine. Some that I think you'd find interesting.
First, there's the "always makes me laugh, thought provoking, I swallowed a dictionary" blog of Michelle aka Mishy aka Chelle aka Softsunshinegurl aka (okay I'm done). To look into the mind of the beautiful, sassy, and sharp Chelle, you can find her at www.mishy_butt.blogspot.com
Second, there's the "sensitive, music nazi, I too swallowed a dictionay, leaves Jenn speechless, " blog of Gabe. To look into the mind of the intelligent and captivating Gabe, you can find him at www.outrunthesun.blogspot.com
Then there's the "I just started my blog/hogwash, music's my world, Gemini" blog of Eric. To look into the mind of the spontaneous and eloquent Eric, he can be found at www.youonlydietwice.blogspot.com
Well, I hope that if you find yourself lost in the minds of these kickass people you leave them a comment. We all love comments! So enjoy!
posted by Jenn Doll at 2:32 AM
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
So, it's like I've been thinking of a million and one things that I've wanted to post about. I finally get here, and I have nothing. But I shall say that I've slept well for about 3 nights now. Not for many hours, but without waking up. Jealous? So I guess the most talked about thing for me right now is me going back to Cali. That's pretty much what Mariah (my bestfriend) and I talk about. That's a lot of my conversations with Gabe. We're such dorks. We sit there and play out what's gonna happen. Like everything from when we get off the plane to when we leave. Yeah right!! With us four, like anything's predictable. What four you ask? Gabe and his bestfriend Eric, and me and my bestfriend. OH YEAH! It shall be perpetual bliss! I think anyhow. Because we'll forever remember "the trip to Cali." And when we talk about it or tell the story, we'll say with a smile. Yeah, I know, I shouldn't be optimistic that it's going to be perfect. But I don't think the four of us would have it any other way. Gabe and Eric are kickass! They're sarcastic little bastards just like Mariah and I. Though they're in for a treat with Mariah. She's quick witted with the remarks and you always laugh. Even if it's about you! I can't wait. We really shouldn't talk about it because I think we just get each other all worked up. At first Mariah was like, yay, it's gonna be fun. Now there's day's where she's like, "I was just thinking about the trip, dude it's gonna be sooo fun!" And when she's all worked up I get there quick. So we have the whole trip planned. We get in Wednesday to Burbank and drive straight to Ventura. Me and Chingy gonna be chillin' at the HolidayInn. Or me, Gabe, Eric and Mariah. Yup, that's right beachfront hotel room. Jealous? So that's what we're doing all day Wednesday. Maybe hit up downtown Ventura. My intentions are for the four of us to get thrashed that night. That will be our way to break ice! Since we're all alcoholics! Then Thursday we drive back to their town, Lancaster and Eric's going shopping at the Hello Kitty store! Isn't he cute?! Well, he's taking Mariah since she's a Hello Kitty rat, but still. And while they're doing that I'll be on my way to meet "the mom!" Oh me, oh my! I kid! I kid! I love to meet the parents. Parents love me! Usually more then their kids. Haha. So then after Eric buys some pink Hello Kitty accessories for himself and I've met mom we're headed to Hollywood. Eric and Gabe are gonna kick their dancing shoes and we're headed to Sunset Boulevard where it all goes down. These crazy white boys are gonna show us crazy Hispanics how to dance! I kid! I kid! They can't handle me! Anyhow, then Friday we're gonna have a "tattoo party." It seems as thought the four of us have that in common. We all love getting tattoos. See we drink and get inked! You wish you could roll like us! I'm not sure that we'll all get one, but I know Mariah and I want one for sure. Then Friday night we're having a house party at either Gabe's or one of his friends. This way I get to hang out with the cool cats I met last time and Mariah can meet some new people too. Gabe says, they're gonna show us how it's done! OoOoOo, scaaaarrrrry! I'm excited. Then Saturday we're headed over to his brothers in Pasadena (however you spell it). So Dan can show us to throw them back. I didn't really get to drink with him and his sweetie Marleigh last time. So this time we'll have more time to hang out. Then Sunday, we come home. So I guess it's obvious that we're all excited. Don't be jealous, just be happy that we're gonna make history!! Well I've been babbling for a while now, so I shall set you free. That's if you didn't stop reading like after the first paragraph!
In the minds of four, we shall leaving you wanting only more!
posted by Jenn Doll at 3:18 PM
Monday, August 23, 2004
Really, I'm not sure why I'm here. I have nothing to write about. I was just reading some of the blogs that I usually read and I felt posty. Then I got here and um realized that my mind is blank. I guess that's a good thing. I mean I'm not worried or stressed about anything. Well so my mind say's I'm not at this moment. I was watching the Olympics, that's been fun. It's diving. Those girls are freakin' insane and extremely in shape too. But I do like poke at the fact that none of them have boobs! Boobs = fat and Olympian's = negative fat. Sharon just said, "you know why Mexico doesn't do the diving competiton?" I'm like, "no, why?" She said it's because they're good swimmers! Haha? I thought it was funny! So anyhow, back to flat Olympian's. Should I admire the rest of the body or should I be like "haha, I have boobs!" Hmm. . . Well, I've decided that I admire the rest of the body. But still, haha I have boobs! Which soon I'll probably lose too 'cause of my dedication to the gym. Yes, I workout! Pfft, how dare you be like yeah right. So yeah, my mind is still blank and um I'm sure it's obvious. So maybe someone will tex me so that I won't be so bored or blank minded. Until next time. . .
Blank minds aren't necessarily a bad thing! No for real, they're not!
posted by Jenn Doll at 1:31 AM
Thursday, August 19, 2004
Absence makes the heart grow fonder? Absence makes the heart forget?
I can't seem to come to a conclusion with this. I think I've experienced both. So what's your take on this? Because quite frankly, absence is making me craaaazy!
posted by Jenn Doll at 3:08 AM
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
You got me all twisted in the game boo!
posted by Jenn Doll at 6:49 AM
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
Funtimes and happy thoughts?
Something's gotta go wrong 'cause I'm feeling way to damn good! Yeah, it's a song. But it's how I feel right now. Someone said that my posts were sad. They weren't meant to be sad. But I guess
everyone interprets things differently. But then again, I did read them after and they sound like they can be. Just like the dumb comment I left Mishy/Chelle. Trying to compliment her, but it came out wrong. I broke it, but I fixed it.
Anyhow, SMILE. . .I am!
posted by Jenn Doll at 3:53 AM
Monday, August 16, 2004
Behind these eyes...
No one knows what it's like to be the bad one
To be the sad one behind these eyes
And no one knows what it's like
To be hated, to be faded to telling only lies
But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscious seems to be
I have hours of only lonely
My love is vengeance, that's never free
No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings like i do
None of my pain woe can show through
But my dreams, they aren't as empty
As my conscious seems to be
I have hours of only lonely
My love is vengeance, that's never free
No one knows what its like
To be the bad one
To be the sad one behind these eyes
I need to discover. . .
(changed the wording a bit and left some out, purposely)
posted by Jenn Doll at 3:47 AM
Lost, yet again...
It's that over-whelming burning sensation you get in the pit of your stomach. It's surprising every time you get it. You like the feeling but at the same time you want it to go away. It's the best worst and the worst best feeling you could have. You have no idea why or how you've been affected like this, you just have to deal with it.
I think I'll drown in my thoughts again.......so I'll be back later.
If you need me, leave a message, I'll be lost. . . yet again, in
posted by Jenn Doll at 12:57 AM
Sunday, August 15, 2004
I pierced my lip today! Yay! Go me, go me! You don't have to like it, I do! SCORE! Mom say's, "Jenn, why are you a weirdo now and not when you were younger?" I said, "Mom, because you can't make me take it out now." Good answer huh? Grandma's gonna go get her lip pierced now! Or not, but still she's a down Mama! Oh yeah, and I'm going back to Cali, risin' surprisin', I'm going back to Cali. . .nah I don't think so. Remember that song? But yeah, I really am going again. AND, my best friend's gonna go with. I CAN NOT WAIT! Yay, yay, yay! Excitedness kicks in. (Yeah, I know that's not a word.) Gotta work now.
My lip's sore, kiss it and make it better?
posted by Jenn Doll at 12:12 AM
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
Lost. . .
Profusely thinking. . .
Overwhelming thoughts. . .
Distracted from the world. . .
No words to express. . .
"In this sweet madness, this glorious sadness,
it brings me to my knees". . .
Completely confused. Completely lost,
in my silent reverie. . .
posted by Jenn Doll at 5:32 AM
Thursday, August 05, 2004
Cruel Irony. . .
It's been a while since my last post. Right now I don't really feel like typing much. I'll start by saying it's been crazy since my last post. I got into a fight and my ass kicked by APD after. Yup, the police. Two male cops at that. My son already had to miss a day of school because he got sick. Work's been hectic. I can't stand driving my car with that dent. I'm asked to go back to California, which I really want, but there are "buts" and "ifs." I have to get ready for the ball, which I've slacked on. And I need a new comfoter for my bed so I can change my room. What I really want right now are more tattoos or piercings. That would calm me, but I'll have to wait that out. So I've decided to change my hair color all up. Haven't yet, but on Friday. So basically I spend my time bitching like a pansy these past days or couple of weeks. Yeah, that good ol' girl in me, bitch, bitch, bitch. Oh well. Well, I'm here at work so I'll be getting back to that. I'll give more detail on the fight later. As for the title on this blog, it pertains to the ass beating from the cops. I've NEVER had a problem with them until I started working for them. Now if that's not cruel irony, what is? Hi my name is Jenn and I am a victim of police brutality! Haha, I walk around saying that now. I think it's funny. Though I hope karma hits those cops hard and soon.
Anyhow, until next time. . .
Fu** the police! (That's ghetto yeah, but oh well! Maybe I should get a new job? )
posted by Jenn Doll at 12:46 AM